Friday, January 28, 2011

Wildlife Encounters of the Married Kind


Housework Man (Homo soapiens) is highly variable in appearance, achieving an average height of 1.736m throughout its North American range. Its plumage is often abundant, becoming more so on the back and ears with age.

Habitat and Habits
The call of the Housework Man is a plaintive, whinging sound that has been likened to pay attention to me, pay attention to me. Housework Man is active for approximately twenty minutes per week, and is rarely observed outside the breeding season.

Man housework comprises a minor, yet valuable, component of his habitat.

Housework Man is a delicate beast. The savvy woman recognizes that man housework - no matter its quality or quantity relative to her typical weekly output - must be lavishly praised, and diligently and reverently maintained for at least seven days following its completion. Anything less is liable to cause Housework Man offense and, given his finicky nature, may put Housework Man off his man housework indefinitely.

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