Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Good Grief

The 7 Stages of Dealing with New Government Policies

Disbelief
"They can't possibly mean what they're saying here."
"This is going to take forever to do."
"You've got to be fucking kidding me."

Denial
"My project is clearly grandfathered in."
"This guy has no idea what he's talking about."
"Nope. Nope, nope, nope. There is no way I'm doing that."

Anger
"The guidance documents aren't even internally consistent!"
"How can they possibly expect this of anyone?"
"You've got to be fucking kidding me!" 

Bargaining
"Can't we just throw some money at this?"
"Maybe if I just try this instead..."
"If You just get this application through, I swear I will never do another one ever again. Amen."

Guilt
"I have a bad attitude."
"I don't even care about the environment anymore, I just want this project to end."
"I wish I had measured the diameters of those shrubs better."

Depression
"I am so over budget."

Hope
"Hm, this report is pretty sexy... maybe it will go through after all..."
"Well, at least we have a template now."
"Aaaaaand - invoice submitted!"

The term "stages" is somewhat misleading, as it implies a stepwise progression. In reality, these are more examples of emotions a consultant may experience when dealing with New Government Policies, and not all individuals may experience all of these reactions. Conversely, some consultants may feel much more Anger than others. It is common for an individual to fluctuate wildly between the different "stages" as they learn more about the New Government Policies and how they are being randomly interpreted by different people in the same damn regulatory body implemented.

If New Government Policies are troubling you, you may find venting over a bottle of wine with a colleague helpful. I'll drink pretty much anything red. Call me.

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