Saturday, August 23, 2014

Optimist, Pessimist, Humourist

I love my work - I really, really do - however, in general, and as wildlife biologists have long surmised, it is not particularly exciting. Sure, there are wee bits of it that are fun (like that part where ridiculous sums of money show up in my mailbox, whee!), but no one is ever like, "Because dichotomous key! Bwahaha!"


In fact, sometimes my work is so dull that I just fall dead asleep on the prairie and only wake up because I'm snoring so loudly. (To be fair, this was near the end of a marathon field stint and I was pretty tired in addition to bored senseless.) (But no excuses for the times I woke myself up by drooling on my hand or dreaming elk were jumping on me!) Some people drink chamomile tea in the evening; I just tuck a Daubenmire frame under my pillow and pass out cold from the sheer boringtude it emits.

But I seem to have fun, right? That's because I have this superpower, you see: I'm specially equipped to have way more fun than is reasonable in a given situation. I have fun all by myself, just in my own head, in spite of all the botany I am subjected to on a daily basis. (Really, it's the only way I could even cope with it. I know some botanists - okay, well, one - who have completely zero sense of humour and I seriously don't know how they haven't offed themselves yet.) If you're specially equipped in this way, you're likely to find that hilarity is all around you. It's like how optimists see good things around them and pessimists see bad things: I see funny things. But it wouldn't be a superpower proper if just any old schmoe could do it, so let me clarify further: I see funny things like Superman sees your gotch and Haley Joel Osment sees your great-great Aunt Helen. I see... beyond.

Or maybe I'm just crazy. Who knows! Either way I'm having a ton of fun, and my Tuckeb runneth over.

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